When you’ve found something good, you want it to last and never lose it. And seeing that so many people live up to the til death do us part’, it isn’t something out of the ordinary. But then again, so many of us struggle with relationships. Things can go wrong for anyone at any given time. The key is to get past the hurdle rather than taking it to be the end of the road.
Relationships are only as good as you want them to be. It’s all about the things you do to keep it going. After a sure period of time, we tend to take our relationships and our partners for granted. We stop doing some things that we previously used to do, consequently, things change. Here are a few things that you need to bring back so as to make your relationship last.
1. The things you both enjoy
Given that you’re completely different people, you’re going to have varying interests as well. But there has to be something that you both like. If you both are absolutely in love with nature, you could maybe watch the sunrise or sunset together, go to the beach or visit the countryside or any number of things.
You need to constantly find things that interest the two of you so that you can spend time together. If you don’t have any such thing, you wouldn’t know what to do together. And spending time with each other would become too much of an effort, leaving you slowly drifting apart.
2. Spend some time with them before going to bed
If you’ve had the longest day ever, it could just be lying with them talking about what kept you so busy all day long. You don’t even need to do anything special, as long as you break away from everything else to make time for the two of you. It might not be possible to do every day, considering how different your schedules can be, but don’t give up on it completely. It’s not only relaxing for you but also good for the relationship.
3. Don’t go to bed angry
You hadn’t time to talk about something bothersome all day long, and when you’re getting ready for bed, that conversation turned into an argument. Don’t ever sleep on it! You may choose to not pick it up in the morning, and then keep avoiding it for some reason or the other. What happen then? It doesn’t go away. Just because you’re not talking about it doesn’t make it disappear. It keeps gnawing at you on the inside. And you take it out in the form of another argument, and then another, never getting to the root of it.
Arguments are inevitable, but don’t let them ruin a perfectly healthy relationship. Recognize the worth of your relationship and make sure you tell your partner that they mean more to you than the argument rather than trying to sleep it off.
4. Start and end your day with a hug and a kiss
Ask anyone about the best way to start your day, and it would be, wake up with a smile. Hugging and kissing your partner first thing in the morning not only puts a smile on your face, but makes them happy as well. However long you’ve been in a relationship, physical intimacy never loses its value. And to keep that alive, the least you can do is to end your day exactly how you started it.
5. Trust each other, blindly
It takes time to earn someone’s trust, but it is worth it; since it’s something that is returned. If you’re going to expect the worst from them, they wouldn’t be bothered to do anything other than live up to your expectations. Trust them to do the right thing, to be there for you when you need them most and to be faithful, and they’d try to never let you down.
6. Acceptance over apologies
There must be things you absolutely hate about them, but even those things contribute to who they are. You aren’t perfect either. Instead of picking each other apart, and apologizing for what is innate, be grateful to each other. If you’re putting up with their habits, so are they. Cease fretting over the things you can’t change or fix and start focusing on the good.
7. Celebrate the little triumphs
You’re supposed to share everything together. The griefs as well as the joys. Support them in everything they and push them to accomplish even more. And even if it is seemingly insignificant, it is an accomplishment all the same. They put in time and effort for what they have achieved. It is as good as a reason as any to be acknowledged and celebrated.
8. The smallest things make the biggest difference
An unexpected text or call, a home-made meal, watching something of their choice or many such things. They don’t sound like they could make any difference at all, but they do. They make all the difference. It shows them how thoughtful you’re and that they always try to make time for you. Also helps revitalizing your relationship.
9. Be understanding
Listen to what the other person has to say, with an open mind. You may not share the same view, but there are so many ways of looking at something. You don’t necessarily have to agree with each other. Try understanding why they feel a sure way about something, rather than trying to convince them to look at things your way. Feelings are fragile, and they aren’t mended easily. Be very careful in dealing with them.
Humor can help you get through a variety of situations. It simple lightens up everything. However awkward or serious the situation may be, a good sense of humor can always turn things around. It’s alright to laugh at each other as well, as long as you’re not being hurtful.
These comprise only a few simple tools to an everlasting relationship. Different things work for different people, and this list could vary accordingly as well. Try incorporating these things in your relationship and you’d see a positive change.
The more you understand yourself, the more silence there is, the healthier you are. —Maxime Lagacé